Onion article sheds light on Jon's mustard obsession

Jon sent me an article the other day which did an amazing job describing a recent aspect of his life.  Mustard. You may ask, how does mustard become an "aspect of someone's life?"  Well if you read the article, which I've excerpt and linked to below, you will understand. I truly respect Jon's ability and willingness to reflect on himself, but the problem about the article is that it is from The Onion, a satirical  newspaper that does an amazing job of perfectly making fun of everyday life. You may have chuckled through many an Onion article in the past. But it really hits a nerve when the jokes on you...or your husband.

The title of the article is Man On Internet Almost Falls Into World Of DIY Mustard Enthusiasts. Here is a quote from the article to give you an idea of what I'm talking about.

Gibson's descent into the depths of mustard obsession started innocently enough, when he got involved in an Internet exchange about the best kind of mustard to use on a grilled bratwurst. When someone posted a link encouraging him to "click on this if you really want to spice things up," he took the stranger's advice and suddenly found himself on MustardMonster.com, a discussion group devoted to the cultivation, preparation, and enjoyment of the table-side condiment.

"I immediately realized I was out of my league," Gibson said of his first encounter with the Internet's do-it-yourself mustard community. "At that point I had maybe three different kinds of mustard in my refrigerator, but when I looked at their forum topics, these guys were talking about the strengths of unique varieties of imported mustard seeds, brewing your own vinegar for mustard-making, ways to improve store-bought mustard when you find yourself in a pinch. That…that was the start of what I now call my 'lost year.'"

Over the next few weeks, Gibson broadened his palette with many new and "exciting" mustards, an experiment that soon led him down a path toward compulsive mustard connoisseurship.

The likeness of this article to my reality really hit home, when I read the following quote from the wife in the article:

 " I thought it was pretty neat at first," said Gibson's wife, Heather. "After a while, though, it seemed like every conversation we had was about something the people on his mustard website said. One night I woke up at 3 a.m. and found him bathed in the light of the computer screen, posting his latest mustard thoughts to the message boards."

"That's when I realized the mustard had come between us," she added.

Lucky for us Jon's internet obsession with mustard (and other DIY food related issues) benefits us here at Pearl's Kitchen. He did develop our special mustard slurry, which helps our corned beef sandwiches stand out in a crowd. He perfected the braising liquid for our corned beef and has been studying the art of injecting brine into massive cuts of meat. And I will be able to take the multiple trials of sauerkraut currently in our fridge and cook them with the pounds of home-cured bacon to create a Pearl's Kitchen Reuben that will kick your butt. Of course that won't happen until he's satisfied with the proportions of fresh horseradish in his Russian Dressing.

As long as Jon continues to obsessively develops the techniques for creating the base ingredients for Pearl's Kitchen dishes I can take those ingredients and do some good cooking. It's a partnership that works, even if if it does sometimes get out of hand.

 Bacon in the Makin

Injecting a corned beef

 Prepping the Passover brisket